The Can-Can (Demo)
Transcript
[Song: Morpheus (Spike Jones Parody)]Crusty: (singing)
Ma chere, ma chere
Joli toujours contraire
Donnez-moi le donnez chef
Donnez donnez be half safe
Cheri, cheri, you look like Gene Autry
Your figure is like Trigger, ma cheri
Bon vie von vie, von bon mot
Moe?
Bon vie Vaughn Monroe B.O
What ze Hildegard, cheri
[Applause]
Oo la la! Bonjour!
Chuck E. Cheese:
Hey Crusty, where did you learn to speak French?
Crusty:
My great grandfather was French, he worked in a cat house.
[Audience Laughter]
Chuck E. Cheese:
Oh yeah?
Crusty:
That's where he met his wife Fifi, but he divorced her.
Chuck E. Cheese:
Why?
Crusty:
'Cause she was a dog!
[Audience Laughter]
Chuck E. Cheese:
Hey, wait a minute- wait a minute. Cats can't marry dogs, it's unnatural.
Crusty:
No you don't understand she was a cat, but boy what a dog!
[Audience Laughter]
You see, Fifi used to dance in the can-can.
Chuck E. Cheese:
What's a can-can? Two toilets side by side?
[Chuck & Audience Laugh]
Jasper T. Jowls:
Duhh my cousin used to dance around in the can.
[Jasper Laughs]
Chuck E. Cheese:
Would 'ya shut up 'ya beagle brain!
Crusty:
Now I'll do the song that made Fifi the most famous pussy in Paris.
[Song: Morpheus (Spike Jones Parody)]
Crusty: (singing)
La
La-la-la-la
La la
La-la-la-la
La la
La-la-la-la la
Take it Jasper!
Jasper T. Jowls: (singing)
Gah gah
Guh-guh-guh-guh
Gah gah
Guh-guh-guh-guh
Gah gah
Guh-guh-guh-guh gah
Guh-dl-dl-dy Guh-dl-dl-dl-dl-dy
Guuh
Guh-guh-guh-guh
Gah gah
Guh-guh-guh-guh
Gah gah
Guh-guh-guh-guh
Guh-guh-guh-guh guh
Crusty: (singing)
Everybody sing!
All: (singing)
La
La-la-la-la
La-la-la-la-la-la
La
La-la-la-la
La-la-la-la-la-la
[Everyone begins overlapping la's to parts of the melody]
La-la-la-la la, la, la, la-
[Pasqually Begins Repeated Sneezing Followed By Horns & Random Instruments]
Chuck E. Cheese:
Oh he's not gonna do this again, watch it- close the doors!
[Slipping sound]
Aw jeez.
[Sneezing Halts]
[Gunshot, Body Falls]
[Musical Sting]
[Pasqually Sneezes]
[Audience Applause]